One niggly thing - in the expansion, it should read "Breathe with your mouth" and "I can't breathe", instead of "breath", which is a noun, not a verb.

Just thought I'd point that out... :-)

marco, is that joke of yours translatable? My dictionary is refusing to help me. :(

es lo mismo en mi ciudad. A veces llega la ambulancia de forma rapido y otros veces se tarda horas.

It's the same in my city. Sometimes the ambulance arrives quickly and other times it takes hours.

Can somebody tell me how 'sometimes' translates to 'a veces'?

Gracias por la ayuda

cierto  suena algo antigua pero en ingles, se puede decir 

a veces = at times = hay veces = sometimes

Here's what Marco's joke means:

¿Qué le dijo un ambulancia a una moto y la moto a una ambulancia? What did an ambulance say to a motorcycle and (what did) the motorcycle (say) to an ambulance?

La moto le dijo a la ambulancia: “Tan grandota y tan llorona”  The motorcycle said to the ambulance:  "(You are) so huge and such a crybaby"

Y la ambulancia le contestó: Y tu, tan chiquita y tan pedorra  And the ambulance answered him:  And you, so little and such a fart machine.

vocabulary:

lloron/llorona, from llorar 'to cry': crybaby.  Here it refers to the wailing sound of the ambulance.

pedorra/pedorro, (slang) from pedos, 'fart':  Farty, flatulent.  Here it refers to the sound and smell of the moto.

strangely i had a senior moment today when i wrote en vez de meaning in place/instead of and it just didnt make sense to me. i had to look it up. i cant remember how i rationalised it in the end but thatll be the rum kicking in.

lamentablemente, mi 'interior rubia' aparece incluso cuando estoy sobrio.

unfortunately, my 'inner blond' appears even when I'm sober.